going to a public toilet and realizing the person before you hasn’t flushed
Me as a doctor: This patient is down with the sickness
when your mom tells you to do the dishes
i hate the website weheartit??? you can hear tits??? do they even make noise???
when you want to have a conversation with someone but theres nothing to talk about
For earth day, I’m consuming 12 lbs of dirt from my backyard
see that girl you just called a bitch? she didn’t hear you say it louder